I found more old writing

19 November, 2010

I am Maaamaaaa and I am ready to burst, fit to pop, fit to be tied.

I am 36 weeks pregnant with my third child and awaiting the inevitable. It may be soon, it may have been sooner if we didn’t have a specialist doctor to help with that: our Neonatologist from OHSU prescribed a progesterone medication suspended in a type of oil, injected directly into my ass – or my thigh if I was ever inclined to inject myself, no thank you! – every week for 20 weeks, starting at week 16. Im positive that it is the sole reason #3 has made it this far.

I didn’t get to hold or room in with our first 2 babies because they were 5 ½ and 7 weeks early, respectively, and breastfeeding didn’t start for up to 2 weeks and under supervision when they were out of their little humidicribs for brief stints. I am mutedly overjoyed at making it this far, and that I will be able to do all of the above in a very short time indeed. Overjoyed because #3 will not have to spend 3 weeks in the NICU, but mutedly because I feel enormous and am also running around (well running is not quite accurate) after 2 monkeys, 3.5 and 2 years old. But really they are very good little boys, and we were actually talking over dinner about being awesome, and how one can simultaneously be awesome and naughty or awesome and a silly billy. Indeed. So im not too muted, but im not actually running around, either.

In any event, I have just been jabbed with my last needle, and need only wait presumably until the medication is out of my system for said system to start the evacuation process of …baby girl or baby boy? Our eldest has gone from one to the other but recently has settled on the baby being a girl, and our youngest tends to repeat whatever is said to him on any given subject, unless as it may or may not relate to the newly reopened kids club, where anything important depends largely on the jumping castle, and how massive his jumps are. As for names, the eldest has his preference and I think he will be quite angry if we go with something different, but again, the youngest just repeats the most recent name suggested. But middle names? Our first 2 have grandparents’ names, remaining grandparents already have namesakes, so we aren’t sure what to choose and have trouble agreeing on this one.

But how does one go from the standard 2 to the big leagues? Many will argue that 3 kids is hardly the big leagues, and others will ask the question how is 2 kids not the big leagues? There is certainly sleep-deprivation for all concerned. But consider, 2 kids = 1 parent each for hugs and being carried around etc, unless strong daddy picks up both for photo shoots and limiting the boohoos. With 3 kids there aren’t enough parents, although there are enough arms, but then do you have to have another to even up the arm equation? And to negate the middle child syndrome? Ive been told that 4 = 2 middle children, go figure. But we are considering 4 because my husband doesn’t want a middle child, and I suppose he is willing to risk two of them. But that madness is for another time.




20 November 2010

When my husband and I met we pretty much fell instantly in love, I actually proposed to him on the first night and he turned me down, boo! After that brief setback we agreed that we wanted a good handful of kids – or a handful of good kids – and we started without delay, and it would have been very easy to stop at one. How can you love anyone more than your own child, even another version of your own child? But of course you can, you don’t run out of love you make more of it, so we made another baby. Of course you can’t just make more room in your house or your car for a third kid, that’s another financial situation entirely. Luckily we have a sizeable house and had the “typical” American car that was really too big for our family already, but roomy enough for #3 plus trunk/junk space. And yes, if you have kids you almost always have junk in your trunk, probably in more ways than one, and if you don’t then go to hell. So we started thinking what it would be like with a third monkey, which is sort of impossible but we tried it anyway. How would things go at the supermarket? Playdates? Out of the house in general? How would we cope on our own if the other is travelling for work or just lying down with a good dose of “leave me alone”? We started thinking about the logistics of travel, to said playdates or via airports, family holidays or errands. We figured we could handle it, but then husband said if three then four, and I acquiesced. So there you have it, the beginnings of the big leagues. Pure naivety, pure madness.

So the bags are packed, both for myself and for the boys to spend time at a friends house while it all goes down, and now im just waiting. Every twitch and twinge makes me wonder if this is it, but I know that if you have to wonder then generally it isn’t it. Next week is Thanksgiving and im tossing up if I want to go anywhere because its dark and will probably be raining (or snowing?) if we do, and perhaps that would be the day. Its only 40 minutes away, but 40 minutes in the car w upset monkeys and inclement weather and contractions? Count me out! An equal priority right now is seeing the new Harry Potter movie before the baby comes, but we plan on Tuesday (today is Friday) so hopefully that should be fine.



27 November 2010

Today is 37 ½ weeks, oh my goodness!

We made it to Harry Potter, we made it to Thanksgiving, we’ve made it. Im not sure what else there is, because now im just waiting, and feeling like such a hypocrite. The baby capsule is in the car, the crib is all made up and we bought infant diapers today. Im not sure what else there is. I don’t even have anything to occupy my nesting instincts anymore, and that’s saying something! We moved into our house 18 months ago then renovated after that, so things were moved around and boxed and lost and, needless to say, there was quite a lot of rubbish lying around the house. But now there is no more and ive nothing left to do. I even managed to repack my hospital bag with things I will need rather than emergency supplies, which I would have used a few weeks ago and did use for the first 2 births. I ought to be catching up on sleep because Im sure that will be the death of me over the next 6 weeks, but I cant even do that because my body wont co-operate. My eyes are tired but the rest of me won’t shut down, last night I even lay in bed for 2 hours before getting up for a crying #2, and even after that I didn’t go straight to sleep. Grrrrrr. And today, everyone is asleep except me, boo!

Anyway, husband and I were of the opinion that if we made it to Thanksgiving then baby would be born the weekend or early in the week following, so I have to keep waiting. And don’t get me wrong, im not impatient even though that is exactly how I sound, I just don’t know what else to do. I keep expecting something to happen because it hasn’t, this is surely a dream pregnancy (for me anyway) because of the length but also because of the lack of even general or minor complications or even inconveniences, but im twiddling my thumbs. That’s probably why I cant sleep, because im waiting too hard.



2 December 2010

So here I am, still pregnant! 38 weeks and heartburn from my belly button to my nose and still no baby. Of course its wonderful news, more than we ever could have hoped for, but I am getting somewhat bored, and I realize I am impatient. Which is hypocritical, but normal to want to be done, I think.

I have started to have little pains which could be indicative of something, but perhaps nothing, perhaps that is normal for 38 weeks of pregnancy. I have also been pretty much vomiting into my mouth on a semi-regular basis, and feel like I need to go (go go) to the bathroom, but in the end there is nought. Now that is frustrating, and I expect that is because I have an enormous (average sized) baby lolling about on my colon, but I cant tell the difference until after the fact. And even then all I have to do is stand up and I think I have to go again.

Bored and hypocritical I may be, but husband and I are also excited, we are getting very excited. We still have not reached agreement on names, and I made a point of showing #1 the letters of the names we have on our list because he can recognize his and his brother’s “special letters”, even though he has told everyone in his class that he is getting a baby sister, and he is emphatic on the name that he wants for said sister. We have whittled down the first name list but cant decide on middle names. The first 2 have middle names after their grandfathers, if #3 is a girl she will have the same, but if it’s a boy…I thought of something super cool the other day but forgot it of course, because I didn’t write it down, boo!

Aside from names, I managed to look online for the reflexology points to induce labour. They all recommend not doing it until your due date or past, but for a third baby does that really apply? I asked husband for a rudimentary foot massage last night, but that obviously was to no avail, I think I even had less niggling pains than I did yesterday, hmmm. But since I printed out the “instructions” we will try again after the monkeys are in bed, and see how we go.


So I have rethought that approach, and will give myself a few more days. Im sure I would wonder how far baby would have gone if I got a foot massage and it did start from there…



6 December 2010

We are 39 weeks and watching Top Gear reruns. Waiting is dismal, especially when things started on Saturday (but petered out) and all day every day I think “this is it”.

So yes, Saturday night things were rolling for 2.5 hours but ended in nothing; Sunday night brought the same thing to a lesser extent, but nothing else, boo! At least last night we decided on the boy middle name, so we are decided then and wont have to discuss it between heaves and hoes. Now we just need the baby to actually come out so we know which one to use.

What have I been doing to keep myself occupied for yet another week of heavy pregnancy? I cant imagine, I cant even remember. I really need to check the calendar on my phone to see what ive been doing… I’ve had a few playdates with #2 while #1 is at preschool, and we don’t tend to do much in the afternoons because its too dark and cold after naptimes. Occasionally we have gone bowling, visited the library or scooted to the kids club if we wake up early enough, but otherwise husband and I have been encouraging the monkeys to play in the basement so they aren’t awake until 9pm because they haven’t been active enough after a glorious sleep. Ive also managed to keep up the cooking and cleaning – shock and amazement! Muffins, banana breads, yet more pumpkin soup and every skerrick of laundry has been taken care of. What else can there be? Ive run out of flour, sugar and butter so I cant do any more cooking, and ive almost washed everything in the house, so theres nothing else there either, so…

Ive started a new book, which im not loving but ive read the others in the series and have the following one as well, so I have to struggle through. And that is what I did last night/early early this morning because I couldn’t sleep again. I lay awake for nearly 2 hours before just getting out of bed. I was surprised how well a glass of warm milk worked at making me sleepy, but it didn’t stop me from reading on the couch for nearly an hour. I know what will cure all this energy…



9 December 2010

At my doctor appointment a few days ago we actually discussed what would happen if I went overdue, oh my goodness! Husband and I never thought the medication would be so effective, but to the point of overdueness? No chance. I still have a week to go until the supposed big day, but another 10 days after that I cannot imagine. That would mean an actual Christmas baby, rather than a baby in the house by the time Christmas rolled around, which is what we meant when we told the monkeys.

Anyhoo, I have managed to keep myself from going insane, at least not quite completely insane. We went and bought our Christmas tree from a family farm over the weekend, and that was really nice. I didn’t think I would be able to because we were assuming we’d have a teeny new addition by then, what naivety! #1 wanted only to watch the Christmas cartoons on the tele in the barn, #2 bawled his little eyes out when one of the “tree boys” helped him into the wagon, and neither of them wanted anything to do with Santa or Mrs Claus, whom we picked up on our wagon ride around the farm. And the wagon was super bumpy, so I was really surprised not to be having a baby in the car on the way back to our house, but obviously my cervix has more fortitude than I give it credit for.

After blowing the tree with the garden vac to discourage any creepy crawlies from coming into our lounge room, we were able to decorate the tree and hang some more tinsel around the room before packing the boys off for naps, but now I am policing the tree when they are not sleeping because things keep getting pulled off “but im just looking at it”.

And now the prospect of those holiday activities is looming because we haven’t had the baby yet. And I was a little sad at the prospect of missing those things, but that was surely balanced by the inevitable tiredness of having a newborn, but now…those feelings are balanced by the impatience of not having a newborn already, and by the thought of having a birthday the day before Christmas!? That does not sound ideal, so, baby, THAT IS A HINT!!




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