Feeding time after the zoo

After a long day with a bunch of animals, it was finally time to take them home. Husband encouraged me to have another nap. I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, so I wasted no time after I closed my own gaping mouth. I think I nodded off pretty quickly but it was all for nought, because I was woken rudely by 5yo. I know he was trying to be helpful, but beneath the layers of sleep, there lies a watchful parent and in my slumber, I must have picked up on the commotion. My entire body was flooded with adrenaline, so my skin was tingling all over and my limbs were all straight and stiff just as he ran into the room. Obviously the nap was ruined and any sense of rest was quickly reversed.
We went out to dinner with friends and Husband spilled a whole pint of beer on me and in my bag. And I didn’t even get dessert! After 3yo fell asleep and managed to stay asleep, Houston pot holes aside (I should say car holes because more than pots would fit in those craters!), the big boys were a bit too fighty with each other at the table and I was a bit too annoyed by it; our friends probably wished they had stayed at home. Husband kept getting distracted by the eyes painted on the shirt of the awkward lady cowgirl statue at the back of the yard. Thank goodness we were not sitting near the bar, bar staff were stackedaroonie.
I was expecting smoked meat, in which case the boys would not have eaten anything, because of course, food tastes bad by association with unknown flavours. But plainish food was plentiful and the boys ate most of a burger and plate of chicken wings, plus the obligatory shitload of fries. I can’t remember what I had, but I know I did have part of some sour apple caramel something or other martini, which was nice as a novelty, but proved too much for me. I left it on the table rather than finish my evening by swigging or gulping, then hurling or ralphing in the creek along the side of the beer garden.
Poor 3yo, as a sleeping gluten free person who changes his mind all too often, there was little for him that I felt comfortable ordering. I had expected him to sleep through the whole dinner and wake up on the way home again. Luckily, though, there were fries all over the table. Our smart friends bought one meal between them, but still had food left over. Admittedly, leftovers for lunch the next day were totes delish, except that there were no fries!
The moral of the story might be that I go out more often sans family.

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