Reading all the vague crappy pictures on facebook, one of those “if you do this then you are that” themes indicates that I am a suspicious person.
At first that seems stupid, who is suspicious these days when the cold war is over? But on second thought I am kind of suspicious all the time, not like those awesome characters on The Americans (when is that show coming back??), just like Michael on Mary Poppins, “sus-sus-sus-Suspicious”.
For example, where normal people would smile and move on or better yet make conversation, I always assume that people who are unnecessarily cheerful out and about are spies (rather than cheerful folk, like) because I’m just not that interesting. But people spying on me would indicate quite the opposite. I also think about Home Alone 3 – or was it 5? – where the kid’s friends went away or were kidnapped or something but people were posing and everyone walking on the street were part of the bad guys group. Yeah that, that happens to me all the time.
I don’t think I’m purposely suspicious of Husband, not like in bodice-ripper novels about 7 year itches or whatevers, but I think sometimes I suspect his motives. I can only assume that is because I am sleep-deprived and shitted to tears on occasion by the people I made myself, because Husband is very undeserving of suspicion. He is one of those sincere people who actually want to help people besides themselves… Excuse me while I rip off my bodice.